White, Mary
Battle Creek, Michigan
December 6, 1889
Portions of this letter are published in 2SM 247.
Dear Mary K. White:
I received your good and interesting, cheerful letter, and I was glad that you could have something to do that interested you. I have been having quite a hard time since conference. You know such meetings call into exercise all the powers that I possess. I carry the burden by day and carry it in the night. Night after night, the Spirit of the Lord was upon me, and I would arise and write. I wrote one morning twenty pages before breakfast. The next day was the Sabbath. I spoke in the forenoon and attended the afternoon meeting and read that which I had written. It was right to the point. Then I read some things which had been reported spoken November 1883, which was right to the point and settled some points in reference to the working or non-working on Sunday. 6LtMs, Lt 75, 1889, par. 1
There were earnest efforts made to pass a resolution that in the South, where opposition is very bitter, that they refrain from labor on Sunday. Elder Smith was strong on this ground. But the burden came upon me. I told them it would be [a] great want of faith in God as well as wisdom to pass any such resolution. This fixing up matters supposing a future emergency was a want of faith and entire trust in God, and laying out a definite course to be pursued was not in accordance with the Lord’s manner of working. We must keep out of the Lord’s way and give Him a chance to work, and not interpose our finite ideas and plans to hedge up the way [so] that the Lord could not work for us. This was received quite largely. 6LtMs, Lt 75, 1889, par. 2
Again I was stirred to write. I did so, and just as the meeting of the conference was in a perplexity to know just what they should do, I came in to the meeting and read that which I had written. It was on a similar point, comprising the one mentioned. I told them it was not their work to legislate what the people should or should not do in reference to an emergency. Let God work, and keep your work in resolutions away from the eyes of the world as far as possible. We [do not] need to lay open every plan of our working before those who could not place a just estimate on these things. 6LtMs, Lt 75, 1889, par. 3
As soon as I was seated, Dan Jones, chairman, said, “I move the resolution be laid upon the table,” and it was killed then and there. After meeting Brethren Olsen and Farnsworth shook my hand heartily and said, I know the Lord sent you into the meeting at the right time and to speak the right words. I thank you and thank the Lord; you have helped us over a very hard spot. 6LtMs, Lt 75, 1889, par. 4
Before the meeting I had that gold tooth of mine uncapped, and left until the meeting closed. Well, I attended meetings right along and was strengthened and upheld by the Lord. After the meeting closed, then the tooth began to trouble me. The doctor-dentist thought he could recap it after the meeting, but I could not endure it any longer. It came out broken and [he] had to get a prong out by cutting down the gum. I think the pain after the tooth was drawn was the most severe I have ever experienced in that line. It kept it up for days and is now quite easy, but not healed. The roots were ulcerated. Since this, neuralgia set in stronger than ever, and I have had a serious time with my head. Colds have afflicted me constantly, rheumatism in left arm, and heart has almost mastered me. 6LtMs, Lt 75, 1889, par. 5
My head has not worked for weeks. There is a determination of blood to the brain, but today I have been feeling some encouraged that relief was coming. I shall wait and trust and thank God, [every day] and every night, saying, “Though he slay me, yet will I trust in Him.” [Job 13:15.] I have lain awake for hours in the night praising the Lord for His mercy and lovingkindness. Some seemed very solicitous for me, but I told them if I should die that is not the worst thing that could happen to me. Let me never be found dishonoring my Lord by voice or pen, mind or body. I am of good courage and I will cling to the arm of Infinite power. Think I shall improve. Yes, I believe I shall. 6LtMs, Lt 75, 1889, par. 6
I did not know what a strain has been upon me since I left Europe, and especially since I came East more than one year ago. We do not forget you, my dear afflicted child. We pray most earnestly for you every day. I have freedom in prayer. We do not forget Brethren Olsen and Matteson and others who are afflicted. We pray; it is all we can do. Then we leave you in humble trust in the hands of One who loves you with a greater love than a mother’s. Cling to Jesus and put your entire trust in Him, for He careth for you and He will not withdraw His hand from you, but will lead you Himself. 6LtMs, Lt 75, 1889, par. 7
Dear Mary, how pleasant it will be to see the King in His matchless loveliness and be where there is no pain, no sorrow, no sickness, no sadness. I feel so clear that we shall be victorious, and I feel clear that the communication is opened between God and your soul. It seems so sure to me that you have the divine Presence and that Jesus is your constant Helper. Oh, He loves you; He loves you, and is looking upon you with pitying tenderness. Never doubt Him for a moment, commit your case to Him, having faith that He will do for you the very thing that is best for your eternal interest. 6LtMs, Lt 75, 1889, par. 8
Sunday, December 8
In the box that went to Denver were some things that were mine, for that box was packed to go to Battle Creek, and the fruit that was to go to Boulder was left in a trunk at Oakland, because they would be obliged to pay extra on the trunk. Did there come through odds and ends of parcels? I cannot remember what was put into the trunk, and what was put into that box that went to Denver and then to Boulder. Some things I miss. I had such a terrible headache when the packing was done, I have no recollection where they were put. 6LtMs, Lt 75, 1889, par. 9
I would be so pleased to see the children. I am making another scrapbook for them. I did not finish the other book, and I thought you might have some nice pieces. If not, I can send you some. 6LtMs, Lt 75, 1889, par. 10
We have just purchased a real nice, but little-worn, cutter for $10.00. We have bought a first-class cow for $45.00. She is large, some[what] like your white cow for size, [a] Devonshire. She will not give milk until two weeks. She gives about eighteen quarts at the two milkings, morning and night, when fresh. We have a boy to tend the fires, milk, [and] feed the horse and cow. We pay him three dollars and a half per week. We have just had a conference in regard to the book work, and had to be broken off for a committee meeting. Willie was one glad boy to get home last Wednesday, I assure you. I am just beginning to use my head a little now. I have not attended but one meeting for weeks, and I find I am not immortal. I must rest. 6LtMs, Lt 75, 1889, par. 11
I wish I could [see] you all together and see your cows and hens. I would have been glad to have been free from this changeable weather. It hurts my throat and head and makes me feel very much as if I were sick. There has been much cloudy, foggy weather. When it comes clear [and] cold, then I feel braced up, but it is very mild, depressing, flat weather. Nothing bracing in the atmosphere. Remember me to Brethren Olsen and Matteson. 6LtMs, Lt 75, 1889, par. 12
Love to all your dear family. I pray earnestly for you all every day. The Lord lives, the Lord hears and answers prayer. Look up, my dear child. Look up; be of good courage; trust wholly in the Lord, for He is your Helper, your Physician, your Saviour. 6LtMs, Lt 75, 1889, par. 13
Mother.