Diary, January 1900
NP
January 1-28, 1900
Portions of this manuscript are published in 2MR 167-169; 17MR 28; 4Bio 404-405.
Monday, January 1, 1900
Sunnyside, Cooranbong, New South Wales
1899 has passed into eternity with its burden of record sealed up, to be opened when the judgment shall sit and the books shall be opened. (Revelation 20:11, 12, quoted.) This day I consecrate myself unto God anew. We are privileged as well as summoned to be workers together with Jesus Christ. We are to work out our own salvation with fear and with trembling. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 1
Tuesday, January 2, 1900
Sunnyside, Cooranbong
I am very thankful for rest in sleep the past night. The Lord is good, and greatly to be praised. W. C. White was called by telegram to Sydney to meet Brother Salisbury. A printing establishment is to be sold at Melbourne at large discount. If we had the means it would be purchased for Cooranbong and from the Melbourne press. May the Lord lead us at every step is our prayer. We must move guardedly at every point. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 2
I have trouble with my left eye, but I have asked the Lord to heal my eye and the difficulties may be removed from me. He is able to do all things. Satan is the destroyer, and Christ is the Restorer. He has given His word, and I believe that I do receive the things I ask of Him. He has never said, “Seek ye My face” in vain. [Psalm 27:8.] This pain in my left eye is a severe trial and test to me. I have been using my right eye to bear the burden largely—to do the seeing for both eyes. I am writing with my left eye bound up. Nevertheless, I cannot see any way but to write. I am praying, “Lord, increase my faith to perfect trust.” In every burden the Lord lays upon us there is a blessing for us if we will only discern it. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 3
The American mail goes tomorrow, and I have much to write. Have written seventeen pages since three o’clock a.m., prepared for the mail which leaves Cooranbong at nine a.m. As soon as I take my pen in hand I am not in darkness as to what to write. It is as plain and clear as a voice speaking to me, “I will instruct thee and teach thee in the way which thou shalt go.” [Psalm 32:8.] “In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct (make plain) thy paths.” [Proverbs 3:6.] 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 4
We are to trust the Lord with all our heart. We have proved the Lord. We have the sure Word on which we shall rely. Christ assures us, “I am the light of the world.” “He that followeth me shall not walk in darkness, but shall have the light of life.” [John 8:12.] “When thine eye is single, thy whole body also is full of light.” [Luke 11:34.] Praise the Lord, I have verified His promise! Since I was a youth eleven years old I have believed the promise. I will cast my helpless soul upon the One who has bought me with the price of His own blood. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 5
Wednesday, January 3, 1900
Sunnyside, Cooranbong
We are closing up American mail, which must go this morning. Sara is as busy as she can well be, packing up to leave to go to Hornsby. We intend to spend a few weeks on the sanitarium farm during this hot weather. Sara is worn out with care and responsibility. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 6
The dedication of the Health Retreat—preparing the food for so large a number was no small item. Our own home was robbed of its furniture and food prepared to feed all who came to my house. The home was well furnished with borrowed goods, and then all the borrowed things had to be moved back again to their place. These things bring care and much responsibility. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 7
We found Brother Radley and his wife with two horses and carriages to convey us to the farm [that has been] purchased. We found Brother and Sister Woodward very pleasant people. They have three children on the farm. The house was a good, small-sized, nice cottage. There is a well-made piazza round three sides of the house. It was hard finished, plastered, well-painted, but full of vermin. The paper had been put on top of two coats of paper beneath the outer papering. We dared not move our things into the house. Sister Woodward had her goods piled upon the piazza, for the premises were alive with vermin. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 8
We ate our lunch with W. C. White, Brother Radley and wife, Sister Peck, [and] Sister Sara McEnterfer. Some time before, when we came to view the place before purchasing, we had eaten in the woods. Brother John Wessels and several others were with us then. We thought best to eat in the woods again, and we all enjoyed the refreshments of simple fruits and grains. We left in the afternoon for Strathfield, and the cab took us to Sister Wessels’. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 9
We had a very interesting meeting and sat up some time conversing. Brother Wessels was in New Zealand attending camp meeting which was being held in Auckland. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 10
We have intense interest to see the work carried forward as fast as possible. We do much praying, and we believe the Lord is preparing our way before us. We need increasing faith at every step. The Lord is good and has courage to impart to every one who will do His will. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 11
Thursday, January 4, 1900
I awoke in the morning scarcely able to breathe. Sydney is no place for me to recover strength. I was to remain at Sister Wessels’ until the house was prepared for our making it a home for a few weeks, but I was so prostrated I could not, dared not, remain. We went to Summer Hill, and I occupied the room Elder Daniells had used at tract and mission house; it was airy and I could breathe better. We were made welcome at Brother and Sister Hindson’s table, and I had the nice accommodations of the room Sister Graham occupies when she is at home. She was called to Melbourne. Here I remained for one week, struggling to keep my strength, that I should not be utterly prostrated. Notwithstanding this, I spent some time in counsel with my brethren—Brother Hindson, Brother Salisbury, W. C. White, and Brother Sharp. Sara was at work seeing what could be done to get the recently purchased sanitarium cottage in decent order. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 12
We have very much to consider. We have been toiling hard to lay the foundation of our work upon enduring principles, as Christ has given us. Our coming here to Australia was at a time when the banks were broken and means so very scarce that we not only have to give the Word of life but largely to provide food for the hungry and also to clothe those who need clothing. It has been a time of veriest poverty. I do hope and pray the Lord to provide us with the necessaries of life, that we can divide with the worthy, needy poor. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 13
We have had to do this kind of work since we came to Cooranbong. We have a large work before us, and this missionary field needs not only the Bread of Life from the Word, but the bread to eat to sustain and encourage the poor families that have been in good circumstances but because of the failure of the banks are in distress in every place. We will look to God for our help and strength. I am encouraged day by day to look to Him for the help we must have in order to help feed the hungry and clothe the naked. The Lord does comfort and strengthen us as we put our trust in Him. I leave my bound books in families that are not in the truth, hoping that they will read and be converted. Oh, the Lord is God and His mercy endureth forever! I think I will have a history to write. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 14
Friday, January 5, 1900
I am still physically weak, but it is about ended. We are hopeful that if I can be free from seeing and talking with people now, I shall recover. I have had such difficulty to breathe that it has seemed so tiresome to me, and there are heartaches, so I hardly know what to do with myself. Yet I try to write. I wish, oh so much, I was away in the mountains somewhere and could be alone [a few] weeks until I am able to bear all these burdens in this missionary field; but I am hoping that not a question will come to me to lead my mind out on a train of thought, for I cannot then throw off the burden. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 15
Had a long talk with W. C. White and Brethren Salisbury and Sharp. This mostly took the time of the forenoon. I tried to relate some things which would be a snare to us to undertake, such as the work of supporting the worst class of people, hoping they would be converted. I am assured this is not our work now. We must not consume the uncertain means, that the Lord has in His mercy placed in our power to use, to do this class of work. There is not sufficient funds even to pay our workers—to sustain the ministers and their colaborers in the large interests in our camp meetings. At all these meetings, people will come who are poor, and who will become interested and will repent of their sins and be converted. These must have help to enable them to help themselves. Some will lose their positions, and we must take hold and help them, find them something to do. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 16
The profligate and the drunkard will avail themselves of every chance to eat and drink at another’s expense, and put every penny they can get into the till to benefit the liquor seller, while they drink the dram that makes them worse than brutes and smoke the tobacco which benumbs the sensibilities to all moral and spiritual perception. We have a work that requires means to sustain the ministers in the field to preach the gospel, and every church needs to sit down and count the cost together and consider what every individual member of the church can do. Each should work to the utmost of his ability to interest the people who have never heard the truth, and thus carry forward the work, for the Lord says, Advance. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 17
Calls will surely come to invest means in various lines that are called beneficent work for the degraded—add new territory, proclaim the message of truth! Means are employed, house rent is paid, and infants are taken in to support. This is not the Lord’s devising, when there is a poverty-stricken church who are in need of food and clothing. Sydney and the towns about have special asylums for babies. An appeal is made for the infants’ home when the means are needed to call ministers into the field and keep them there to present the gospel to the people who are in the darkness of error. There are traps laid to secure every shilling, and this devising is not the inspiration of the Spirit of God for it is binding about the work that so much needs to be done. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 18
Sunday, January 14, 1900
Sanitarium Farm
I awoke and dressed at a quarter before four o’clock a.m. Wrote four pages to W. C. White. Had season of prayer with Brother Woodward and his wife. They need to be helped to understand the Scriptures more perfectly, and the Lord will make the impression upon their minds. Sara and I rode down to Thornleigh to get a box of goods from Cooranbong, and we decided to wait until the train from Sydney came in, as Brother Sharp might be on the train. When the cars came and left there were Brother and Sister Robinson and Gladys, Brother Sharp, and Brother John Wessels and his boy. We took in Sister Robinson and Gladys and the Wessels lad, and the three men stripped off their coats and walked to the sanitarium farm. We had a good dinner out on the piazza and all enjoyed it. There was abundance of fruit—peaches and apples—eaten that day. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 19
Monday, January 15, 1900
I was very busy writing for American mail. Brother and Sister Hughes, from Cooranbong, were on the morning train. We drove to the station to meet them. We were very glad to see them and converse with them. They were interested to look about the newly purchased farm. Everyone who sees the place is more than pleased with it. All feel so anxious to see the sanitarium going up. The large expense for the buildings hired would just as well be paid in hiring money to build a health home on the land now purchased. This is a healthful place. The altitude is high and the air bracing. I am much pleased with the location and all who see it are pleased. The air is bracing. A cool breeze comes from the sea and is refreshing in the hottest weather. We sit out on the piazza and are using the piazza as our reception room. Our bedrooms are only twelve by twelve, and there is no room to entertain people in them; therefore the piazza is our dining room in one end and reception room in the other end, and we feel grateful and well accommodated with this piazza. Brother and Sister Hughes tarried with us overnight. We accommodated them, Brother Hughes sleeping on the piazza in my steamer chair. All seemed cheerful and bright and thankful that we had a piece of land on which to build. There are fruit trees in abundance and of many varieties. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 20
Tuesday, January 16, 1900
I am very busy with American mail which will be taken into Sydney by Brother and Sister Hughes. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 21
They left on the morning train at Hornsby Junction. We feel the situation here needs to be looked after. There is need of a strong horse and cart to carry away the fruit that is to be marketed just now, and the land should be plowed at once. The orchard has been sadly neglected, yet may be brought up and revived, and there is much trimming that needs to be done. Trees—some half dead and others dying—need to be cut out. With these useless things removed a vast improvement will be made. We with we had a supply of means to set things in order here. Brother John Wessels and Brother Sharp are the ones who must attend to the necessities of the case. Neither of them is a farmer. Brother Ryan can tell what ought to be done, but one is perfectly helpless without means to do with. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 22
Wednesday, January 17, 1900
I decided to go back to our home in Cooranbong on the evening train. Brother and Sister Robinson were making their way to Cooranbong on the morning train, and Brother John Wessels and Brother Dores Robinson came all unexpectedly, walking from the station, and saying Sister Wessels, Sister Anderson, and Sister _____ and her boy were at the station. We sent horse and carriage for them. We had a very pleasant visit and they returned on the evening train. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 23
Thursday, January 18, 1900
Have had a most distressing night, with heart trouble. Some place there is rest [that] I must have. We have meetings on the broad piazza. The large front yard is beautiful with flowers, and is a feast to the eyes and fragrant to the senses, and the fruit ripening is fresh and palatable. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 24
Saturday, January 20, 1900
I was favored with Dr. Caro’s horse and carriage to take me to Stanmore church. We had a good representation of people—the Lord’s own commandment-keeping people. Some few not of our faith were present. The Lord gave me a message for His people, to awaken them to understand their privileges, and their being favored with the light of truth. As they have received so great blessings it is their duty to impart, and in imparting to others they will continue to be blessed in receiving, to still give the blessings to others. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 25
Sunday, January 21, 1900
Summer Hill, New South Wales
I thank the Lord that I am not wholly prostrated. I am favored with the privilege here at Summer Hill of Brother Daniells’ room. Here we have our counsels, and if quiet my mind can work. I take my meals at Brother Hindson’s, and sleep in the room Sister Graham occupies when she is doing her work in the office at Summer Hill. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 26
Sara is up at the sanitarium farm having a general cleaning and tearing off of paper and putting on vermin-killing substances. Three coats of paper had been put on with glue-paste and it was a long, hard job for the workers to get it off, even with hot water. This work cannot all be done in a moment of time. It takes time to do this work. Cleansing and fumigating and papering have to be done. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 27
I am here, waiting and watching and praying and writing, for I must not give way to my feelings. I am so glad the Lord gives me strength to counsel with Brethren Sharp, Salisbury, Hindson, Caro, and many others. I had several earnest talks with brethren upon important subjects. I think I shall be careful and not get confused. The Lord is my Helper and everlasting Friend. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 28
I was invited to speak to the patients in the sanitarium. The parlor was full of patients—some in rolling chairs, some on sofas, some in rocking chairs, bolstered up with pillows. My message is always to encourage and comfort the suffering ones, and to speak the truth to them in love. I spoke of the healing of the paralytic. The Lord attended first to the work he most needed. He said, “Son, ... thy sins be forgiven thee.” Had he not been told by priests and rulers that they had no words of comfort for him for he had brought this affliction upon himself through his wickedness? Had they not left him in hopeless despair? And were not the first words of Christ the sweetest words that ever fell upon his ears that was music to his soul? “Son, be of good cheer; thy sins be forgiven thee.” [Matthew 9:2.] Then the murmuring commenced: “Who can forgive sins but God only?” [Mark 2:7.] “And, behold, certain of the scribes said within themselves, This man blasphemeth. And Jesus knowing their thoughts said, Wherefore think ye evil in your hearts? For whether is easier, to say, Thy sins be forgiven thee; or to say, Arise, and walk? But that ye may know that the Son of man hath power on earth to forgive sins, (then saith he to the sick of the palsy,) Arise, take up thy bed, and go unto thine own house. And he arose, and departed to his house. But when the multitude saw it, they marvelled, and glorified God, which had given such power unto men.” [Matthew 9:3-8.] 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 29
After I had spoken many words unto them in regard to Christ being the Restorer, Satan the destroyer, I begged of them to place themselves under the banner of Jesus Christ. All seemed to be pleased and encouraged. I greeted them all by clasping each person by the hand and speaking encouraging words to them. I thank the Lord we have a pitiful, sin-pardoning Redeemer. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 30
The Word of God contains the most momentous truths of heavenly origin, which afford to the receiver food that nourishes the soul and fills the mind with thoughts the most elevating and ennobling. The mind is strengthened and ennobled, while the heart is filled with purest emotions. The Scriptures will be found to resemble the Garden of Eden in which the Lord God hath made to grow every tree which is pleasant to the sight and good for spiritual food. But in this garden no divine cherubim with flaming sword prohibits access to the tree of life. All the human family of God, which Christ has taken into close relationship to His own humanity, are subjects which He has redeemed by giving His life a Substitute for them, that the human family shall have a second probation. And everyone has the privilege to put forth his hand to this soul-reviving fruit. All may partake of the fruit to the full and live forever. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 31
I greatly desire that the Lord will impress the mind of Dr. Caro that he will not trust to his own wisdom. It will lead him into strange paths. There is the danger that correct principles will not be carried into action in his work as a physician. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 32
The medical missionary work is to be in all its bearings that which the name signifies, [read] 1 Corinthians 1:4-7. There is great danger of there being a careless, cheap kind of education, even as a practitioner; and he is not qualified to undertake all those complicated, difficult cases given to the students. The Lord would have everyone who is connected with the sanitarium understand that there is great need of much prayer and sobriety, and yet cheerfulness and the sunshine of Christ must be brought in. There must be watching and constantly praying, guarding every movement of the physician in word and in action in connection with the nurses, that there shall be no evil surmisings. Each one is to consider that both teachers and students are on test and trial. If all will realize their individual responsibility and each one will become as God would have him, then the Lord will work with the teachers, physicians, and students. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 33
Tuesday, January 23, 1900
I am thankful to my heavenly Father for rest in sleep. This is a great blessing. I am able to write and I am so glad, so glad that we may look and live. Every hour, every moment, is precious. I find I cannot go to the farm today, for the wheel came off the trap and cannot be repaired before Wednesday. But it is all well. I have to continue the subject I commenced yesterday. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 34
Wednesday, January 24, 1900
I was instructed during the night in some things essential for all the people of God to understand in His service. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 35
I rose a long time before day Wednesday. Rode fourteen miles to Hornsby and home to sanitarium farm. The carriage is not pleasant for me to ride in, but I am able to make some improvements. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 36
Friday, January 26, 1900
Sunnyside, Cooranbong, New South Wales
This is the last day of the week, preparation day. The Lord is good and very precious to my soul. I was up early and wrote many pages. W. C. White, May White, and the twins visited Mr. Barnes at Martinsville, six miles from Cooranbong. We found him sick, and he expressed a very hearty welcome. He is afflicted with a very angry swelling upon his leg. After having a short visit with him, we went out in the field and picked blackberries a short time and obtained leave to come and secure all the berries we wanted for the table and to can. It is hard picking, and yet they are excellent berries once picked. There is abundance of fruit if it can be secured. The White family enjoyed this ride together, for it is seldom we have the privilege. We had an interview with Robinson to read program of the Week of Prayer. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 37
Saturday, January 27, 1900
Sunnyside, Cooranbong
Sabbath Brother Robinson spoke to the people. There was a goodly number out to hear him. The weather is very hot and trying. I am trying to prepare articles for the papers and to write appeals to reach our people as soon as possible, soliciting help to erect our sanitarium of which we stand in so great need. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 38
Sunday, January 28, 1900
Cannot sleep past one o’clock. The Lord is my Helper. I must take my writing and do what I can, for many things are to be written that are essential to come to our people in America. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 39
We feel very anxious to do all in our power to lift the heavy debt on our schools. I have proposed to give to the benefit of the school my book on the parables. They may have the avails of this book in every place for the benefit of the school to pay the great debt that has been created through not heeding the messages that the Lord has sent. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 40
More than twenty thousand dollars was consumed in creating an additional building in America. They asked Sister White by letter for advice. The letter was answered. The light given me of God for them was given them distinctly that not a brick should be laid to incur additional debt, and close investigation should be made to ascertain the reason for so heavy a debt already existing. But the counsellors in Battle Creek, notwithstanding, concluded that the testimony coming to them did not mean what it said. The appearance was that they must have more buildings; and they did build, following the imagination of their own hearts. Now they are involved in embarrassment, and I am, through the grace of God, trying to help them out of the difficulty they created for themselves in not doing the very things the Lord gave them counsel they should do. They went directly contrary to the light God gave them. The counsel of men was accepted, for it looked so wise to them to make additions that they imagined they must have. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 41
There will be every excuse made for men to follow their strong imagination, and the instruction the Lord gives—who knows the end from the beginning—is cast aside as a mistake. “Let God be true and every man a liar,” that shall countermand God’s counsel. [Romans 3:4.] If men will refuse light, they shall have trouble. The yoke of perplexity which they have chosen for their own necks always galls when this is the case. But how much might be saved if those who claim to believe the testimonies [would accept those] the Lord has sent them, rather than to cast them aside and crowd forward their own human devising, which costs heavily in the end. This is the work that is now being done. 15LtMs, Ms 89, 1900, par. 42