I [will] have been here one week tomorrow night. The climate seems to agree with me, but I can do but little. My strength does not come very fast. I was unable to sleep after three o’clock. I stopped all writing and tried very hard to overcome this habit. I have done better here than any place since I left Colorado. I have a nice little room with open grate, and we are surrounded with abundance of wood. My horse, Black Prince, proves to be a treasure. He will take me forty miles per day and not show any great weariness.3LtMs, Lt 20a, 1881, par. 1

I long to get back to Oakland but dare not go, for the least exposure brings upon me now, even here, quick and severe congestion of the lungs. I am afraid of the cold atmosphere. It clogs my lungs. I rode three miles this morning for the mail and immediately my lungs congested. I coughed all the way but when the sun shone I was relieved. I took a foot bath when I arrived home, and lay down. I am better now. But we were all fixed so nicely in Oakland; I want to give it another trial.3LtMs, Lt 20a, 1881, par. 2

There is a family of eight very fine people from Oakland who have been here three months. They say they are afflicted with colds all the time when in Oakland. They remain here till February. They describe the very same condition of head, throat and lungs that I have had. But I look at my pleasant home in Oakland, fixed up so nicely, and I feel like crying every time I think of it.3LtMs, Lt 20a, 1881, par. 3

But Willie, if you will bring with you my little girls, May and Addie Walling, I will go on the Healdsburg place and make that my home. I have offered it for four thousand. If I can sell it, I will build me a little cottage near the [Rural] Health Retreat and live here. They have good schools here, they say. Brother Pratt says he shall take his children down to Healdsburg and school them, and perhaps this is what I ought to do—go on my place and make Healdsburg my home. You may bring my children. If I ever go east, it will be to remain there only a short time, to return again.3LtMs, Lt 20a, 1881, par. 4

I have written you quite often. Your letter was mailed to me from Healdsburg. I want to hear from you and Edson often. (Look into Edson’s matters. If he really needs help, let him have it. I will cancel that note of five hundred if you think best.)3LtMs, Lt 20a, 1881, par. 5

I have had one of the greatest struggles I ever experienced in my life in fighting down feelings which would come up in regard to many things. But I have, I trust, gained the victory. The struggle of soul almost mastered me. I would go over all the history of the past by day and through the night. A cold sweat would start out from the pores of my body. I spent many sleepless hours through severe congestion of the brain. I have entreated the Lord most earnestly to give the peace and rest of mind I needed. I know my prayer is heard. I have left myself and all with Jesus. He will care for me. He will give me rest in His precious love.3LtMs, Lt 20a, 1881, par. 6

I hope the Lord will give you wisdom, courage, and fortitude. I hope that the Lord has been indeed presiding at the General Conference. I have had some good letters from Mary, but have heard nothing from Oakland for one week, although I am constantly sending letters to them.3LtMs, Lt 20a, 1881, par. 7

I will write tomorrow or very soon in reference to things at home in Battle Creek—what to bring with you and what shall remain. I dare not go to Los Angeles until I gain more strength. I have no power of endurance.3LtMs, Lt 20a, 1881, par. 8

Do not neglect to write me. I think the children should be with me in California. Send your letters to Oakland and I will keep them apprised of my where-abouts. Will you see Dr. Hill and secure his labors here? Have him come soon, for I think he should commence as soon as possible.3LtMs, Lt 20a, 1881, par. 9

It is so dark I cannot see. Tell Sister Mead to let Sister Mary [Chase] have anything in line of vegetables or canned fruit that she needs. God forbid that my husband’s sister should be in any way neglected.3LtMs, Lt 20a, 1881, par. 10

Mother.

I thank the children for their letters.3LtMs, Lt 20a, 1881, par. 11

Lt 20, 1881

Lt 21, 1881