Have completed a long letter to the church in Lemoore. Was visited by Elder Corliss. We conversed for more than one hour. I was very weary. Ate dinner, then Sister Marks from Washington, D.C., desired an interview. My head ached. There was much heat in my head which made it difficult to concentrate my thoughts.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 2

Willie [White] came at noon and I was glad to see him. He thinks it was well that I did not go to the meeting in Penfield. It was very difficult to reach. Elder Olsen and W. C. White attended the meeting.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 3

I paid ten dollars for a sleigh. Purchased it of Brother Gardner.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 4

Sister McCullagh’s daughter visited me and I gave her some motherly advice.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 5

December 5, 1889

Battle Creek

Arose at three o’clock and commenced writing a letter to Elder Daniells. Wrote 22 pages during the day.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 6

Brother and Sister Wessels visited us. They took dinner with us. We had a pleasant interview. They are from South Africa, seeking to learn the truth more fully, to return to South Africa prepared to work more intelligently.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 7

Visited Fred Walling.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 8

The carriage has gone for Edson White, my son. It will be pleasant to have both my children at home at the same time. If dear Mary, Willie’s wife, and children, could only be here it would be gratifying indeed.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 9

December 13, 1889

Battle Creek

I could not sleep this morning after two o’clock a.m. I devoted some time to earnest pleading with God that He will give me of His Holy Spirit.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 10

I want the spirit of wisdom, an intelligent knowledge of His will. I am placed in circumstances where I do not know what to do or which way to turn. I press my petition to the throne for the Lord to be my Counsellor. I see I need more grace.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 11

Letters come to me from persons who have been in trial and in difficulty over some course pursued by their brethren, which is contrary to their ideas. If I express an opinion, ever so guarded, not designing to reflect upon my brethren and sisters at all, my words are misinterpreted, misstated and misapplied, and the one who sought my counsel understood and reported the matter as he wanted it should be and not according to the real facts as presented.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 12

They wrest my words as some wrest the Scriptures, and letters come to me asking me if I did say thus and so when they thought I was kind and tender and true to them. Amid the cares and burdens of labor in conference and in much writing, I cannot call to mind the exact words uttered, and the only answer I can return is, I had no reason to speak to the detriment of any one of these mentioned. I had no ideas concerning these matters of the character which would leave any such impression upon the minds of the persons I was conversing with, to the injury of any one.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 13

These things cause me to come to the conclusion that it cannot be my duty to have private interviews with individuals who have trials and difficulties to bring before me. They say it is for the good of the cause of God that they desire my counsel, not that they have any personal trial themselves, but they use my words frequently to give strength to their own personal feelings, to sustain their own ideas, and to vindicate themselves as being in the right and others in the wrong.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 14

This is a matter that troubles me much. If I do not have these private interviews with my brethren and sisters, I am troubled, fearing I have neglected to give help, to reflect light and knowledge when I had opportunity and prevent discouragements and close a door to temptations. And if I do consent to counsel, a use is made of my words that is very unwise, and things are repeated to me that have never entered by mind. They will, in their difficulties or in a strait place, vindicate their position, catching hold of a word that may have been spoken that they interpret altogether differently than I meant it to be or that I had ever thought or intended. I decide I will not talk with my brethren and sisters in regard to their difficulties, but refuse to do this to all. I am perplexed to know whether this is the course Jesus would have me pursue. I pray to the Lord for wisdom that He will give me His Holy Spirit in all my speech.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 15

I am inclined to think, in regard to counsel had with Brother Owen of Kalamazoo, that he has not used with wisdom the words spoken to him. He has brought a burden upon my soul, using my influence, my name—“Sister White said this,” “Sister White said that”—to carry out his ideas. I am thoroughly convinced from the light given me of the Lord that Brother Owen is a man who pursues a course to great difficulties in seeking to benefit himself. If Brother and Sister Owen would seek to crucify self in the place of crucifying others and would work to create harmony in the place of being at variance with their brethren, even if there were some things that they could not see clearly as just right, they would be in harmony with the teaching of Jesus Christ.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 16

The cause of God in Kalamazoo is wounded, marred, and bruised by the indiscretion of those who claim to believe the truth and who claim to want to save souls when they are hurting souls in every church they connect with. Why do they not put self out of sight? Why do they pursue a course that will lead to variance, to emulation and strife? As I contemplate this matter, as the Lord has presented it to me, I am fully decided that there is much selfishness with this family, which is excused under the cover of conscientiousness. Oh, it is a strange thing that they do not change by being converted, and learn of Jesus Christ, His meekness and lowliness of heart! It is a great work to understand one’s own heart and one’s own motives that prompt to action. If self were hid in Jesus, if there were not a persistent effort to carry out one’s own thoughts and plans and ideas, how changed would be the influence, the spirit, the thoughts, and the practices of some!6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 17

I shall advise Brother Owen to move out of Kalamazoo and go into a church that will have a strong, decided influence over him to keep him level. If he is in a small church where he can have the lead and carry things after his own mind and his own judgment, it will be the worst thing for him, and the leaven of dissension will follow him. He may honestly think himself all right, when his spirit is not right with God. He is weighed in the balance and found wanting. His own heart is poisoned with envy, jealousy, and evil surmisings, and this spirit will be diffused through his family and extend to the church and corrupt and taint the whole lump. If Brother Owen would be transformed in character he would be a peacemaker in the place of stirring up strife. He will not work for the prosperity or growth of any church until he has a different spirit.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 18

I was called from important work in writing to answer the letter from Sister Strong. I have felt the deepest interest that Brother and Sister Strong should come to the full freedom of the children of God, and I have also felt the deepest sympathy for their terrible bereavement. My heart has ached for them. I have longed to pour into their hearts the oil of Christ’s love, to heal the wounds of this terrible affliction in the death of their only son in so awfully sudden a manner and in so terrible a form. I felt that they should be tenderly treated and that the temptations which have assailed them should be overcome, and they feel that we were their friends.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 19

Injudicious words and actions may counteract the painstaking efforts that have been made because doubt, questioning, suspicion, and criticism have been doing their baleful work upon their souls. I felt so anxious to disappoint the enemy, to save them as a brand plucked from the burning. Now if, through injudicious words spoken, they receive the impression I am not their true friend, I can do nothing to help them to save their souls. I am cut off because of wrong impressions left upon their minds—which never should be—and because I am presented in a false light before my brethren and sisters. The purchase money of Christ’s blood has been paid for their ransom, and I would be a laborer together with God to save them and to be a comfort and consolation to them.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 20

December 14, 1889

Battle Creek

I arose at three o’clock and commenced writing in regard to the church, preparing for the Week of Prayer. Brother Bollman from Oakland has been making his home with us for a few days. Brother Corliss called to see me, and afterward Brother Jones, to counsel with me in reference to many things.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 21

I have been awake many hours in the night. I have felt so great need of the endowment of the Holy Spirit. The work is large and important and far-reaching. Christ has said, “Without me ye can do nothing.” [John 15:5.] We must have Jesus; we must have His grace. I spoke to the large assembly in the Tabernacle in regard to the material to be laid upon the foundation stone and the necessity of all being laborers together with God. I felt very solemn on that occasion. Who, I inquired of myself, of this large company here assembled, will be overcomers and wear the crown of life?6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 22

December 15, 1889

Battle Creek

Slept quite well the past night until half past three. Oh, how my soul is drawn out in deep, earnest prayer for myself and for the church! How difficult to arouse a sleepy church—a church that have had great light and do not carry the light with them to enlighten the world. We want, and must have, deeper piety. We want a spirit of supplication. We need the presence of God, and He will work with our efforts.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 23

Monday, December 16, 1889

Battle Creek

Rose at half past three o’clock. Pleaded with God for His grace and for heavenly wisdom. I must have this special blessing of heaven, else I cannot do the work for others that I so much desire to do.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 24

December 17, 1889

Battle Creek

This day our Week of Prayer and labor commences. Meeting was held in the Tabernacle vestry. An excellent meeting is reported. In the evening I spoke in the Tabernacle. “Draw nigh to God and He will draw nigh to you.” [James 4:8.]6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 25

I have presented to my brethren that less time needs to be occupied in sermonizing. Let companies be broken up and several meetings be held for testimony and prayer and confession of sins. Let more time be given to earnest labor for the reformation of souls of youth and for the church generally.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 26

We called for those who wished, before the old year should roll into eternity, to separate themselves from the service of Satan and give themselves to God making an unreserved surrender, to manifest the same by coming forward to the front seats. Sixty-five came forward, mostly students of our school. We then united in prayer for them. The Spirit of the Lord was in our midst. Certainly Jesus was our Guest that night. He has said, “I am with you alway, even unto the end of the world.” [Matthew 28:20.]6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 27

December 19, 1889

Battle Creek, Michigan

I arose at half past three and had a season of prayer. I could not sleep well, for after speaking in the evening I did not sleep until after eleven o’clock, but I arose feeling much better than I had done for several weeks. The Lord is blessing me. I testify to His grace and His love. He shall have all the strength He has given me in willing service.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 28

While engaged in writing I heard a tap upon my door and Professor Prescott entered. He said he hardly thought to find me up so early, but he wished me to come and speak to the students at five p.m. We consulted together as to the best methods to be employed in arousing the interest of the students and the teachers in the college. Our interview was profitable.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 29

At eleven a.m. I met with the workers in the chapel of the Review and Herald Office. There were about 150 present. Brethren Olsen, A. T. Jones, and Corliss were present. I spoke to them about twenty minutes with much freedom. Then there was opportunity given for others to speak, and excellent testimonies were borne. Many referred to the meetings held one year ago. Since that time they had been advancing spiritually. It was the best year they had every had. There was an excellent spirit in the meeting, but oh, we do want the blessing of the Lord to rest upon some in positions of responsibility who will not yield their self-will and live unto Christ Jesus to rich abundance. We asked those to arise who desired special prayer in their behalf, who wanted to place themselves on the Lord’s side. Several responded, about twelve, and as I offered up an earnest prayer to God, the Lord was gracious and His goodness and His mercy was toward us. We were blessed.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 30

At five o’clock p.m. I met with the teachers and students of the college. There must have been two hundred assembled. After singing and prayer, I spoke to them for about fifty minutes with great freedom.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 31

Professor Prescott then said a few words and gave those who wished to become Christians an opportunity to come forward. There were about twenty who responded. The Spirit of the Lord was in our midst. How we longed to see every youth in the chapel fully decided to be on the Lord’s side! We do not feel satisfied with our present attainments. We must drink deep of the wells of salvation. By request I prayed for those who had come forward, and the Lord did indeed draw nigh, and that to bless. Brother Prescott followed in prayer. He remained at the close of the meeting to converse with these students and help them in their endeavors to be on the Lord’s side.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 32

December 20, 1889

Battle Creek

I slept until four a.m. The clock struck nine as I retired to rest. I thank the Lord that I can obtain six hours of sleep. I sought the Lord in prayer and believe He will hear my petitions for physical strength and mental clearness and spiritual power. My trust is in the Lord.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 33

Sabbath, December 21, 1889

Battle Creek

I plead earnestly with God for His grace. My soul desires His salvation, with unutterable longings. Oh, to see His grace and power and glory revealed to His people is the greatest desire of my soul! I long to see the church arise to a full sense of their responsibility and accountability before God, to let their light shine forth to the world in clear, steady, bright rays. The light of many is too flickering, fitful, and uncertain. It will at times blaze forth in bright rays and then it becomes almost extinct. The Lord God of Israel cannot be glorified unless the light shines steadily amid the moral darkness as well as in the light. The light of the Sun of Righteousness is never dim. It is constantly shining upon us. Notwithstanding Satan casts his hellish shadow athwart our path, the light shineth beyond!6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 34

Then why should not the followers of Jesus walk in His light, reflecting the bright beams of the Sun of Righteousness? They may do this. Christ has enjoined upon them to do this, and He makes it possible for them to do this, for He would never enjoin them to do that which it is not possible for them to do. What is possible should be done, not only for their own happiness and peace, but for the good of the world.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 35

We need daily to uplift the soul heavenward, catching the bright beams of light from the Sun of Righteousness. Hath God forgotten to be gracious to His people who fear Him, who love Him? No. Hath He shut up His tender mercies that they can no longer reach His tried and tempted ones? I tell you nay. Look up, trembling, doubting souls. Look up to the face of Jesus Christ, beaming with love upon the purchase of His blood, and doubt no more.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 36

Jesus lives as your Advocate, your great High Priest. He is your representative before the Father in the courts of heaven. His mediation secures you everything that your faith claims. “Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you.” [Matthew 7:7.] Who has said it? The Everlasting Father, the Prince of Peace. He is your Saviour. Never will He fail to prove true to His Word. Never will He falsify Himself. God hath promised. Let faith claim the promise.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 37

Sabbath, December 21, 1889

I spoke in the Tabernacle to nearly two thousand people. What a congregation was before me! And while I looked upon the human faces, I knew also that the Master of Assemblies was present. Jesus, the Majesty of heaven, full of grace and truth, was invisible to human eyes, but He was there. I can have no power of myself. “Without me,” says Christ, “ye can do nothing.” [John 15:5.] I cease not to keep in mind that I am in the presence of Jesus Christ. The words are not mine but His that sent me. Oh, that I may so speak that the will of Christ shall be manifest to His people.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 38

My text was Deuteronomy 32:1-6. “Give ear, O ye heavens, and I will speak; and hear, O earth, the words of my mouth. My doctrine shall drop as the rain, my speech shall distill as the dew, as the small rain upon the tender herb, and as the showers upon the grass: because I will publish the name of the Lord: ascribe ye greatness unto our God.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 39

“He is the Rock, his work is perfect: for all his ways are judgment: a God of truth and without iniquity, just and right is he. They have corrupted themselves, their spot is not the spot of his children: they are a perverse and crooked generation.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 40

“Do ye thus requite the Lord, O foolish people and unwise? is not he thy father that hath bought thee? hath he not made thee, and established thee?” [Verses 4-6.]6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 41

I was led to speak of the sin which rests upon the souls of those who have had great light, for whom Jesus has done so much, and who do not appreciate or respond to the manifest love bestowed. They are losing ground, and Satan is gaining victories over them.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 42

How can anyone remain in impenitence, how can he withstand so great love and remain cold, unimpressible, unthankful, and unholy in a world that God has created? How can he look upon His wondrous works in nature, and receive day by day His gracious bounties which liberally supply our temporal necessities and yet not render to God that obedience, that gratitude and praise and continual, willing service which He requires, and which is His due? How can the universe of God look upon such detestable ingratitude? And to think that while we were sinners, estranged from God, enemies to Christ, He gave Himself to humanity in an offering to save these very enemies from eternal ruin! Yes, He clothed His divinity with humanity and came to a world all seared and marred with the curse. “And being found in fashion as a man, he humbled himself.” Philippians 2:8. What a life to pass on the earth! Not in riches; for our sakes He became poor, that we fallen sinners might through His self-denial and poverty be made rich with eternal treasures. Heaven looks with disfavor upon the despisers of His mercy and the exhibition of His matchless love.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 43

I wish we could all see the hateful thing that sin is, and hate it with that intense hatred it deserves. Oh, that the sinner might see and understand that if his righteousness is based upon any other than the righteousness of Christ, he has missed his golden opportunity and is lost. Well may the true believer rejoice. The truth to him is glorious, a priceless treasure, precious every hour. His faith is firm. He sees in the blood of Christ, his atoning sacrifice. His faith rests in the righteousness of Christ which he accepts as a free gift. All that he needs, as a guilty and lost sinner, he finds in Jesus Christ. Christ’s righteousness fully acquits him from the condemnation of the law.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 44

December 22, 1889

Battle Creek, Michigan

I make supplication to God for His mercy and His grace while the house is locked in slumber. I urge my petition to the throne of grace for more of a sense of the holiness of Jesus. I want my soul filled with His love. I want to have a continual abiding sense of the presence of God. I want the streams of blessing from the Fountainhead. Who can question for an instant the love of Christ for fallen man? When we look upon the Son of God, wounded and bruised on Calvary’s cross, can we marvel that heaven wonders at our ingratitude? Or that the world is astonished at the want of earnest zeal and enthusiasm in His church, which He has purchased at infinite cost—even His own blood? “I have loved thee,” saith the Lord, “with an everlasting love.” [Jeremiah 31:3.] He has chosen us that we should be holy and irreprovable in His presence.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 45

Elder Corliss came to see me for counsel. Two intelligent young men, one twenty, the other twenty-eight, have just been released from the prison at Jackson, Michigan. They have served out their sentence for a term of four years for horse-stealing. The younger stated that his career of crime commenced in reading the published life of Jesse James. It had an influence upon him that was almost irresistible to follow his criminal course. He was completely infatuated and taken captive by Satan. Thus two men went into horse-stealing. They were arrested in their crime, were condemned, and sentenced. Then came their awakening. Shamed and penitent, they began to look to the Lord for help and strength to endure their just sentence.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 46

They were truly converted in the prison, and they worked over hours, earned money, and sent for Signs of the Times, Review and Herald, and Thoughts on Daniel and Revelation, and then they studied. Other prisoners also had access to these publications, and some accepted the truth. After their release they came straight to Battle Creek and solicited baptism. Then they were going back to the place of their sin and crime and show their repentance and what the Lord had wrought for their souls. There were some objections raised to baptizing them, and my advice was by all means not to forbid water that these should be baptized, but with joy and rejoicing perform the rite of baptism, thanking the Lord that these sheep which had been lost were found.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 47

This afternoon I attended meeting in the vestry of the Tabernacle. I spoke about twenty minutes. Many excellent testimonies were borne. The young men from prison were baptized, also one woman, Brother Aaron Hilliard’s daughter. She married against the wishes of her parents and brothers and sisters. She was headstrong. Her life proves to be very unhappy. She has one child. Her husband is a drunkard, a saloon keeper. She has bitterly repented that she was heady and high-minded, a lover of pleasure more than a lover of God. She looks prematurely old, and how hard she finds it to live a Christian life! Poor soul! She talked with me and cried as if her heart would break. She earnestly solicited baptism and the rite was administered this afternoon.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 48

I had a long talk with Elder Corliss upon church matters. Had an interview with Elder Van Horn in reference to his visit to Ohio.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 49

December 24, 1889

Battle Creek

Arose early, and my heart goes out to God in prayer for the church. Every member of this church ought to awake; all should be faithful sentinels for God, realizing the work that is devolving upon them to do for the salvation of souls and the upbuilding of the cause of God in Battle Creek. Oh, may the Lord imbue me with His Holy Spirit that I may speak words in season and out of season that will bring courage and hope to the souls that are striving for the victory. All will have severe trials to endure, for this is the portion of God’s people. There is no safety for any soul except in Jesus Christ. The individual members of the church may be strong and of good courage.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 50

I long continually for greater wisdom, humility, and the meekness of Christ that I may have the very best influence upon the church. I plead with the Lord for Christ’s sake to mold and fashion my character after the great Exemplar. I must be right with God. I feel deeply humbled under a sense of the great goodness of Jesus Christ. Jesus, the world’s Redeemer, humbled Himself and became a man of sorrows and acquainted with grief that He might lift me up. He endured shame and reproach, insult and mockery, and a shameful death, that I might not perish, but have everlasting life. Being lifted up upon the cross, He draws all men unto Him. All will not be drawn to Him; but they may come, they may accept that great gift—the precious gift, so immeasurably greater than any gift ever bestowed, the Just for the unjust. He came to reinstate man before the world and to vindicate the holiness of the divine law.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 51

He came to vindicate God’s glory, to keep all of God’s commandments. Shall we bear our end of the yoke? Shall we lift His burdens? Shall we harmonize with Christ who came to make an end of transgression which had become deep and broad as the world? Shall we show that all this great sacrifice of Christ is not in vain? Shall we, in short, cease to sin? He came to bring in, through His own merits, everlasting righteousness for fallen man. Will we accept His righteousness? Will we cooperate with Jesus Christ?6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 52

Had not Christ made a full atonement for sin there would have been no hope for the transgressors of law. He died for the ungodly. He opened a fountain for Judah and Jerusalem to wash away all their uncleanness. And if we are not washed and cleansed from all the defilement of sin, whose fault is it? Heaven has done all that can possibly be done to lift us from the degradation of sin. In shedding His blood, and in this very act redeeming man when it was his sentence to die, Christ magnifies the claims of Jehovah’s law. He makes it honorable, to stand forth without a mar, full of power and majesty.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 53

December 25, 1889

Battle Creek, Michigan

Last night the Christmas celebration was held in the Tabernacle, and it passed off well—modestly, solemnly, and with gratitude expressed in everything done and said, because Jesus the Prince of Life had come to our world a babe in Bethlehem to be an offering for sin. He came to fulfill the prediction of the prophets and seers which He had instructed them to utter, to fulfill the counsels of heaven, and in this great mission and work verify His own Word. And for this every soul is under the most solemn obligation and gratitude of God that Jesus, the world’s Redeemer, has pledged Himself to accomplish the full salvation of every son and daughter of Adam. If they do not accept the heavenly gift, they have only themselves to blame. The sacrifice was ample, wholly consistent with the justice and honor of God’s holy law. The Innocent suffered for the guilty, and this should call forth gratitude full and complete.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 54

At half past ten I spoke to those assembled at the Tabernacle. The Lord gave me most earnest words to speak. I tried to present the matter in the light of God’s Word, that the work of labor for the salvation of souls does not rest alone upon the delegated minister, but that to every man God had given his work.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 55

The Lord’s work is to be carried forward by the living members of Christ’s body, and in the great divine appointment of God each one is to be educated to act a part in the conversion of souls. He has enlisted in the army of the Lord, not for ease, not to study his own amusement, but to endure hardships as a faithful soldier of the cross of Christ. Every private must act his part, be vigilant, be courageous, be true. After I had occupied about fifty minutes, many excellent testimonies were borne.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 56

We returned home and called to our dinner Fred Walling, my niece’s son, his wife, his wife’s mother, and they came with their two little ones, a babe of three months, and a boy of six years. These were strangers and poor and needed this little encouragement. None of them at the present time keep the Sabbath.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 57

Edson White came home Wednesday evening. He was sick, having taken cold. We were glad to meet him and enjoy his society again in the home circle.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 58

December 26, 1889

Battle Creek, Michigan

I was awake at three o’clock and my earnest prayer to God was for His people that they might be awakened to a sense of their obligations to God. I can see no help for ministers and people except in the Lord God of Israel. There is no hope for Israel except in Jesus Christ. “Other refuge have I none, Hangs my helpless soul on Thee.” I can go to human sources, I can speak of my fears, I can tell of my perplexities, but they generally meet me with their own deep needs and their trials, which they think greater than mine. Oh, indeed, I get no help leaning upon broken reeds. Others may regard me with a careless eye and meet me with a cold response.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 59

A friend, with all his affection and love in Christ Jesus for me, cannot make my case his own. The cup so bitter, so trying to me, he has not tasted. He is not able to be touched with the feelings of my infirmities. But is there no help for us? Yes, there is. Help has been laid upon One that is Mighty, One who has been trained in the school of suffering and trial, One who, though Captain of my salvation, was made perfect through suffering.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 60

I have received visitors today. I have made a call today upon Professor Prescott. I have been burdened to see the course a member of the church is pursuing. There is a Dr. Lusk who claims to be a wonderful physician, and ministers and church members and students are going to this physician in the place of patronizing our own physicians, who are of our faith. This I cannot approve.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 61

There should be a much greater number of physicians of the best material, educated thoroughly and adapted to work and ready to do efficient service for all those who are connected with the church. This is essential, and when there are calls made for sanitariums to be established in other places in the United States and in foreign lands, there will be men whom our people will not be afraid to place in these positions, for this will surely be required. There is a large church in Battle Creek, and this church should be sound and true to the principles of hygienic methods and work in harmony with the light that God has given upon this subject. The course that Sister B is pursuing in Battle Creek is not at all after God’s order. She is not working in the light.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 62

December 27, 1889

Battle Creek

I am deeply grateful to my heavenly Father for one complete night’s rest. I retired at half past eight o’clock and awoke at half past four o’clock. This has given me two hours more sleep than I usually can obtain. I offer up my gratitude offering to God for this precious blessing. My head is so weary, and has been for weeks; but then I have clearness of mind and great freedom when before the people, so I know that I have a Helper by my side and His grace and His power come through the weak instrument to the people. I am thankful for every favor from my heavenly Father. I am full of comfort and peace for I am assured my name is written in the Lamb’s book of life. This is my consolation. Take this away and I am joyless.6LtMs, Ms 24, 1889, par. 63

Ms 23, 1889

Ms 25, 1889