These are the first lines my pen has traced to you. My health is some better. Yesterday I read and copied some things from my diary, and there are still several pages that were placed in my diary while I was at Fresno. I am now going to get this matter off as soon as possible.17LtMs, Lt 264, 1902, par. 1

Edson came to St. Helena Tuesday night, but I have had no visit with him yet, and as he leaves here next Sunday, I cannot see as I can have any time with him. He will not talk of anything that transpired. Just after I put my writing in the hands of Maggie, Edson, who has been writing in the office, called me and put in my hands figures and statements. So nothing that you have received has been committed to me from himself or Emma. They will not talk things over, and I do not wish them to. I have had the matter made plain to me, and I now send, in addition to that which is already sent, the matter which I hope will relieve the situation.17LtMs, Lt 264, 1902, par. 2

I hope you will receive my first letter. I was so burdened I could not but suffer to think—after having the matter of the Southern field, and Nashville in particular, presented before me—that I should be led to think that I should consent to any living power’s taking matters in hand in regard to the work to be done in Nashville. They had no hand in the matter. They have no kind of estimation of the value of the work done and the burdens that have been carried from the first entrance into the Southern field up to the present time. Thousands of dollars have been expended in work to open new fields that have, as was presented to me, not nearly an approach to the showing that has been accomplished in the Southern field. As the matter is now before me, I shall not rest until I have it all out.17LtMs, Lt 264, 1902, par. 3

The light I have now is that I shall collect all that has been presented to me in regard to the Southern field and put it in a book. And this must be done now, as the impression that has gone forth is a great setback to the work. It must be met. I have read such a mass of matter that is now collected—good, better, best.17LtMs, Lt 264, 1902, par. 4

And then to have the enemy use our own people to interpose and say and do things to hinder the work, and to think I consented that I would do nothing to hinder them, but let them do as they thought best! It just rolled on me such a load that before Edson came here, I cried over the matter like a child. I felt so ashamed of myself. I confessed to my Saviour that I would never, never make such a promise again and would work diligently to up-build and not tear down. Your family are all well.17LtMs, Lt 264, 1902, par. 5

I would say, since writing that first letter, Edson came and it was night. I just sat up long enough to see him. My letter went in the noon train. I have written more fully of matters from the diary written in Fresno. I could write only a little at a time.17LtMs, Lt 264, 1902, par. 6

Emma looks very poor. She will spend some weeks with me because Edson wants her to get built up. Both seem cheerful. Emma seemed so pleased to meet us all and to see Lucinda Hall.17LtMs, Lt 264, 1902, par. 7

I have received two letters—from Dr. Evans and from Whitelock. I will send them to you. It is about the repetition of yours after the Sabbath. I will write to Dr. Moran and to the two doctors.17LtMs, Lt 264, 1902, par. 8

Our grapes all spoiled. We had three days of rain. The prunes were all housed—two tons to be stored and kept. They are now in the shop. Two stoves are going day and night, and we think they are all right. I have not been in the carriage for some time.17LtMs, Lt 264, 1902, par. 9

I do hope that which I send you will be received all right. Anything you think best not to hand out you can retain. The light has been given me in a very marked manner that there is allowed so large an amount of gossiping and accusing of the brethren, which places us on Satan’s side of the line. I have been shown that this kind of base material is brought and laid on the foundation stone as a precious commodity, but it will be consumed, and if the actors are saved at all, it will be as by fire. They will be refined and purified by fiery afflictions until they shall see their errors and repent and be converted. Afflictions and sorrow and loss they cannot escape. Then is it not wise for us as God’s people to stop garnering up the rubbish of falsehood, of misrepresentation, which grows as it is passed from one to the other and does great damage to the work?17LtMs, Lt 264, 1902, par. 10

I have been having a marked experience in light given that what our people need is the Holy Spirit of God to cleanse away the defilement of unkind rubbish of talk and passing judgment. Until this is done, all the counsels that we may have will prove a detriment. Unless they are a savor of life unto life, they will be a savor of death unto death. The lips need to have the living coal placed upon them to cleanse away the self-assured conversation which hurts souls and is spoiling the work of God. It is the strange fire that many are handling, and Christ’s words to them in the 13th chapter of John, and in the 14th and 15th and 17th chapters, are not heeded.17LtMs, Lt 264, 1902, par. 11

I was instructed to say that our people are losing in spirituality, for they do not believe many of the messages of truth for this time and the testimonies of the Spirit of God. There is more confidence in their own tongues’ wisdom than in earnest, intercessory prayer. If we pray in faith, if we wrestle with God as did Daniel in behalf of himself and the Israel of God, we shall be kept by the power of God from our own foolish conversation. We need now to have the Holy Spirit’s power, which will clothe us with Christ’s righteousness and give us heavenly wisdom that we shall sit with Christ in heavenly places. If ever we are as a people to become elevated, cleansed, and purified, to reach the highest standard, we must now seek Him with heart and soul and voice, with fasting and prayer.17LtMs, Lt 264, 1902, par. 12

In love.17LtMs, Lt 264, 1902, par. 13

Lt 263, 1902

Lt 265, 1902