Lt 195, 1902
Bollman, C. P.
“Elmshaven,” St. Helena, California
December 8, 1902 [typed]
Previously unpublished.
Diary
Elder C. P. Bollman
My dear brother,—
During the past night I have been much exercised in mind over the past, present, and future of the work at Nashville. Words were spoken by One who understands the situation. “The past must not be repeated,” He declared.17LtMs, Lt 195, 1902, par. 1
Those who claim to be God’s children have varied dispositions. Satan will control every one whose heart is open to his temptations. If permitted, he will take possession of the mind, inspire the thoughts and words, control the spirit, and mold the character.17LtMs, Lt 195, 1902, par. 2
My brother, there is in your temperament a non-religious element that, unless constantly repressed, will strengthen your tendency to pursue a course that will hurt your soul and bruise the souls of those who differ from you.17LtMs, Lt 195, 1902, par. 3
You have every advantage for securing a harmonious development of character. Remember that you have the presence and help of Christ. In daily spiritual life our faith will be severely tried. You are in heaviness of spirit through manifold temptations. But the trial of your faith must continue. If you carry yourself as the Lord’s servant, willing to do His will, and remembering that Jesus knows your every thought and act, you will be given strength to overcome.17LtMs, Lt 195, 1902, par. 4
Christ is acquainted with the spirit you manifest. He knows every impulse of your heart, every purpose of your soul. Your every imagination is open to His inspection. Realizing this, will you not show genuine reverence for the person of Christ, in whose presence you are constantly standing? Will you not be courteous, tender, kind, and respectful to all with whom you associate? Will you not cultivate daily the traits of character that are after the divine similitude? Will you not pray to the Lord to give you an humble heart, and then in word and in spirit live your prayer? If you do this, your stubborn, unyielding disposition will be overcome in the Lord’s own way, not in a way marked out by you.17LtMs, Lt 195, 1902, par. 5
Self must die, Christ’s life must be represented in your life, else you will never sit with Him upon His throne as an overcomer. Your way, your spirit, the standard that you have set up for yourself, must be materially changed if you remain connected with God’s work and workers. You have asked the Lord to teach you how to rest in His love, how to subdue your envious, jealous spirit; but you sometimes desire Him to grant your petition in your own way. Instead of submitting to His way, by your words and your deportment you are liable to strengthen your unenviable traits of character, cherishing in your heart the spirit of evil-surmising and hatred, which grows stronger with every indulgence.17LtMs, Lt 195, 1902, par. 6
My brother, indulge this wicked spirit no longer. Brace up like a man determined to overcome. Walk in the path of self-denial and self-sacrifice. Lift the cross of Christ, and bear it manfully. Ask that the Holy Spirit shall convince you of sin, and give you a closer acquaintance with your objectionable traits of character, a deeper consciousness of the wickedness cherished within your heart, that you may learn to hate and despise the evil of your natural disposition. Be not discouraged at the sight of this evil, but work toward the right with all the capabilities that God has given you. No longer do the work that you have been doing, but begin to do the work that Christ did. He was always a blessing to others. There is a very marked difference between your way and Christ’s way of doing God’s service. It is best for you to work in Christ’s way. As you study His life and His character, you will improve in spirit and in address, and will be preparing to be a member of the royal family, a child of the heavenly King. Following in His footsteps, you will possess the sanctified courtesy, the amiability, the grace of love, of which you are now so nearly destitute.17LtMs, Lt 195, 1902, par. 7
Before entering the courts above, you will first have to enter upon a disciplinary process of softening and subduing your hereditary and cultivated tendencies to wrong. This work will call for watchfulness and much prayer. Your spirit and your works must be reformed before you can win the reward of the overcomer. There are many Christian graces that for your present and eternal good you should cultivate.17LtMs, Lt 195, 1902, par. 8
Do not undertake to mark out the way in which the Lord shall work, but yield yourself entirely into His hands—heart, soul, mind, and strength. Make this your first business; for the Lord has instructed me to say to you that you must be converted before you can be a vessel unto honor. If you will not become thoroughly converted, if you continue to cherish the spirit that you now manifest, it would be advisable for you to separate from those with whom you are connected in the Lord’s work, because others would be injured. Until you are converted, you will be spiritually weak, and will do but little Christian labor for souls ready to perish.17LtMs, Lt 195, 1902, par. 9
You are not now fitted for the work of dealing with human minds. To every man God has given his work, according to his several ability. The talents that He bestows upon man are varied. Different men have different gifts. God requires all, whatever their gifts, to have a clear insight of the practical workings of Christianity in every line of service in which men are called to minister.17LtMs, Lt 195, 1902, par. 10
The great principles of Christian conduct that are laid down in the gospels are plain, simple, and direct. These principles are to be practiced. If every worker would heed the instruction that Christ has given to His disciples, there would be no more contention, no wicked, envious feelings, no accusation and criticism of one another’s work, no rejoicing among satanic agencies over the fact that one professed Christian has educated himself to reflect upon and to undo the work of another Christian.17LtMs, Lt 195, 1902, par. 11
God has appointed no man to be the judge of another man’s work. Every laborer is to make sure that his own work will bear the inspection of Him who judgeth every man righteously. Let those who are so zealous to accuse use their voices to minister to the needs of souls ready to perish. If they find it impossible to enter into the labors of others without taking upon themselves the burden of sitting in judgment upon their work, let them decline to assume such responsibilities. Let them rather take up some line of work that God can trust them to do and put into this work so much consecrated zeal that their efforts will be without fault.17LtMs, Lt 195, 1902, par. 12
God grant, Brother Bollman, that you may begin the work of cementing your heart with the hearts of your co-workers. Pray for the gift of the Holy Spirit. Ask of God, and He will give you His rich blessing. Tell Him that you want the Christian graces developed within your heart. Place yourself as an empty vessel before Him, to receive of His rich grace. You will have to exercise yourself unto godliness. The Lord places you where you must exercise in order to increase your development in spiritual things and to be conformed to His image.17LtMs, Lt 195, 1902, par. 13
I have a deep interest in you, in Brother W. O. Palmer, and in my son Edson White. If you humble your hearts before God, He will bless you abundantly.17LtMs, Lt 195, 1902, par. 14